Below, Muriel Wilkins shares five key insights from her new book, Leadership Unblocked: Break Through the Beliefs That Limit Your Potential.
Muriel is the founder and CEO of the leadership advisory firm Paravis Partners. She is also an executive coach to high-performing C-suite and senior executives, as well as host of the award-winning podcast Coaching Real Leaders.
What’s the big idea?
When leaders get stuck, their first instinct is to do more and push harder. But those actions don’t create lasting results because they’re focused on what they do and not on what they think. Sustainable leadership growth comes from examining the beliefs that drive our actions. Left unchecked, we risk stunting our leadership potential.
1. You’re part of the problem.
Every leader goes through rough patches. If you haven’t yet, you will. I’ve seen many accomplished leaders, from executives to emerging managers, eventually hit a wall. They’re chasing results that remain out of reach, struggling to influence, or trying to find their footing in a new role. No matter their title or situation, they share one thing in common: something is standing in way of their leadership potential.
Despite their best efforts, they’re still blocked. Usually, it’s because they’re focusing on what’s happening around them instead of what’s happening within them. Many high achievers try to hustle their way through whatever is holding them back. They double down on tactics and skills, thinking that if they just do more, they’ll break through. But until you turn inward and uncover what’s holding you back, you’ll keep repeating the same struggle and leadership will feel harder, more draining, and less rewarding than necessary.
2. Old beliefs can’t create new results.
We’ve all been told that if you want to change something, change your actions: work harder, build new habits, learn new skills. But a change in behavior only scratches the surface. Real change happens on the level of your beliefs.
“Beliefs that helped you succeed at one stage of your career may no longer serve you during the next.”
The Buddha said, “What we think, we become.” Modern research backs that up. Scholars of psychology like Alia Crumb, Ellen Langer, and Carol Dweck have shown that what you believe about yourself, your circumstances, and your ability to grow has a measurable impact on outcomes. Beliefs act like the internal code that drives your leadership operating system.
Beliefs that helped you succeed at one stage of your career may no longer serve you during the next. If you believe you need to have all the answers, you’ll struggle to empower others. If you believe your value comes from being in the details, you lose sight of leading through others. If you believe you can’t make a mistake, you’ll avoid risk and stifle innovation. You can’t lead at a new level with the same inner operating system. Until you evolve your beliefs, your results will stay the same.
3. Seven common beliefs quietly keep high performers stuck.
Most leaders share a common set of beliefs that keep them stuck. I call these hidden blockers because they keep us locked in unproductive patterns, and they’re experts at eluding detection:
- I need to be involved.
- I need it done now.
- I know I’m right.
- I can’t make a mistake.
- If I can do it, so can you.
- I can’t say, no.
- I don’t belong here.
These self-talk mantras aren’t character flaws. They’re old success strategies. When you can identify the belief you’re leading from, you regain choice. Awareness is the first step to unblocking.
4. Ease comes when you can uncover, unpack, and unblock.
To lead with more ease, the work is to uncover, unpack, and unblock what drives you:
- Uncover: Bring your belief to awareness.
- Unpack: Examine where the belief came from and how it shows up.
- Unblock: Reframe the belief so that it serves how you need to lead.
This framework isn’t about positive thinking; it’s about strategic thinking. When you align your beliefs with the present moment, you expand your range and elevate your leadership altitude.
5. Great leaders learn to coach themselves.
The ultimate goal is developing the capacity to coach yourself. When you can observe your patterns, question your beliefs, and realign in real time, you no longer need a crisis or coach to spark growth. You become your own coach—grounded, adaptive, and effective—in each moment. As you increase your capacity to coach yourself, you increase your capacity to coach others, which after all is what great leaders do.
“A leader cannot transform an organization beyond their own capacity to transform themselves.”
To lead differently, you must think differently. A leader cannot transform an organization beyond their own capacity to transform themselves. It can feel lonely and difficult at the top, but you don’t have to suffer through your leadership challenges, nor should others suffer because of how you lead. Becoming free of your hidden blockers unlocks your potential for achieving goals, delivering results, and leading with ease.
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